Wednesday, June 09, 2010

Science Fiction Story

2041 AD.

Tarek sighed as he gazed across the harsh terrain that was once California.

It was seventeen years since the end of the Great War. Seventeen years without the warmth and light of the sun had stripped the land bare of all vegetation. Even if there was light, nothing would grow in this soil polluted by the ashes of a thousand atomic bombs. Humanity was all but extinct, with a few thousand scattered around the globe. But without food, without knowledge, the end of the human race was inevitable.

Mankind's only hope was The Book.

The Book, prophecy told, contained all the knowledge of mankind. With it, mankind could start rebuilding what the War had torn apart. It would lead mankind once again to great heights of civilization.

Tarek was the leader of a small band of wanderers who had been searching for The Book. After months of hard marching, tempers were now at a tipping point in the group. Rations were also running low. Tarek knew that they had to find The Book soon.

As Tarek trudged along, he began to ask himself: How can one book contain all the knowledge of mankind? Maybe there never was such a book. Maybe they were on a wild goose chase.

"TAREK!". Ebonil's shout broke Tarek out of his revere. "Take a look at this!". Excitement bubbled in Tarek as Ebonil pointed towards a mark on the rock. "Isn't this the one mentioned in the prophecy?". Ebonil was right! It was. "There should be an entrance to a cave nearby". "There it is!".

Tarek rushed into the cave. As his eyes adjusted to the darkness, a sense of destiny washed over him. In front of him lay the salvation of all mankind. He started to vaguely make out ... a pedestal, on which there was a black slab. The Book.

As he took it in his hands, Tarek realized: The Book was not a book: It was magic. At his touch, The Book began to glow, a glow not seen on Earth for seventeen years. Tarek was overcome with wonder. He began to explore the hidden magic of The Book.

Tarek studied The Book for many hours. It began to dawn on him that it held no knowledge. The prophecy was a lie. There was no wisdom in The Book, it was merely a curiosity. Disappointment washed over him as the hopes and dreams of the human race crumbled before him.

Tarek closed his eyes. He wept.

2011 AD.

Steve Jobs bans the Wikipedia app from the iPad.

Tuesday, June 08, 2010

What really happened.

A Linux programmer, a Windows programmer and an Apple programmer walked into a bar. They were having a heated discussion about which operating system is the best.

"Look, we'll never settle it this way", said the Apple programmer after many arguments, "I have an idea. Look at that girl over there". He pointed towards a smoking hot girl sitting alone at the bar. "Whoever impresses that girl with their Pen Computer will win the argument." They all agreed.

The Linux programmer went first: "Greetings, Female". "Hi", the girl responded. "You know, I just wrote this wicked Emacs macro in lisp to grawp mercurial and auto sync -". The girl tossed her drink at his face "Go away, you creep!". The Linux programmer went away dejectedly.

The Windows programmer was next: "Hi", he goes. "Hi", she replied. "Hey, check out this new game, you'll love it". He showed her a flash game with cute bunnies. "OMG! that's so cute". But just when she was about to give him her number: "Windows has performed an illegal operation and will shut down". "Whatever, loser". The Windows programmer also went away, head bowed in shame.

The Apple programmer kept his phone down on the table and straightened his collar. He went to the girl. "Hey baby, what do you think of this?". He shows her his MacBook Air. "Ooh! That's so cool. I wish I had one". She smiled coyly as she slipped a napkin into his hand "Call Me".

As he left the bar, he made sure that the Linux and Windows programmers saw his gloating face. He danced all the way to his home. He took out his key to unlock the door ....

That was when Gray Powell realized with horror that he had left his million-dollar iPhone prototype at the bar.